Counting My Blessings

I almost lost my youngest daughter tonight.

Braving the crowds at Wal-Mart has always been a source of anxiety for me, but I never thought it could be fatal. Man, I hate that store, and during the holiday season it's even worse! How is it possible to pack that many people into one building and still make it out with your saninty?

I was able to get in and traverse the aisles to get the items I needed, and I was able to do it without too much whining or grabbing from my three children, who were following behind me the whole way. Every once in a while I'd turn around and say, "Put that down," or "Please don't touch." Typical.

I was finally finished and I went to the check out... why is it that I ALWAYS choose the wrong line? Some guy at the checkstand was using some type of gift card and held up the line for 10 minutes. I really hate standing in lines -- especially when I'm so ready to be home already.

Finally, we get our stuff and we're heading out the door. My three ducklings are still waddling behind me as we exit the store. The parking lot is always packed, especially at this time of year... I wait for a clearing in the traffic so we can leave the doorway and head towards our car. I see it and walk out, pushing our cart and our bounty, when suddenly I hear: "Mom!"

The rest all happened in slow motion.

I turn to see my 5 year old sprawled out on the pavement face down -- I glance up to see a Chevy Tahoe pulling forward -- I see a woman who was walking into the store turn and wave her hands at the Tahoe, screaming STOP! -- I start screaming and running to my daughter... The Tahoe came within 3 inches of running her over. The driver couldn't see her when she tripped and thought the path was clear....

A crowd of onlookers voiced their concern to my little girl. I assured them she was okay, despite her hysteric crying. She was scared. She told me later that she saw the car coming and wanted to hurry and catch up with me. That's when she tripped. I bet her tiny life flashed before her eyes in that moment.

Thankfully, she came away with just a scraped nose and a fat lip. I just can't imagine how my life would be without this sweet little creature. I'm so blessed to be a mother.

I'm counting my blessings tonight: 1, 2 and 3

Blog me a Title

I feel inadequate as a blogger. As with any other new "project" I receive in my life, I begin with enthusiasm and high-hopes. Visions of grandeur and accolades abound -- but they are fleeing fantasies, because reality is anything but...

I have a few blogs that I read and their words make me laugh, cry, and everything in between. I often make the mistake of reading before coming here to make my own entry. I open the "create post" screen and blank out. I'm not witty. I don't have interesting things happening in my life. My daily routine is very mundane -- how does one make that entertaining to read about? I know it's possible, because I've read it in others' blogs. -- sigh -- Perhaps I'll have to start inventing a life.

Let's see..... I could be a fairy queen in a land far, far away and I can have sparkles in my hair and a teeny, tiny little waist while eating a banquet fit for my queenship each and every day. I get to live in a fairy castle and every day in my fairy kingdom is springtime. I have many many servants who live each day to serve my every command and I am free to do as I wish.....

It could happen. Right????

What Part of Thanksgiving Are You?

You Are Pumpkin Pie

Even when people are full - they make room for you. Good or bad, your smell is most likely to arouse a man.

What Part of Thanksgiving Are You?

I had to laugh... arouse a man? Me?? By Smell??? What's up with that?

We got tickets to see the newest Harry Potter movie for Saturday morning 11/19 (the day after its release). We only got three tickets, thinking with the PG-13 rating it might be too intense for our younger daughters. Besides, we thought it would give us an opportunity to do something special for our oldest daughter -- a date with Mom and Dad by herself. We thought it would be a fun surprise, so we didn't tell her about it beforehand.

Unfortunately, our plans were abruptly changed on Friday afternoon, thanks to the actions of our eldest....

Friday was a busy day, and I spent a lot of time working on my computer. My boss had given me quite a large workload and I was feeling overwhelmed. I needed a break, so decided to take 45 minutes and watch the rest of General Hospital on the big TV downstairs. When it was over, I trudged back up the stairs to finish my work when I noticed swift movement in my daughter's room. I went in to see what the problem was and found her hiding her face with the book she was reading. I asked her what she's doing. "Nothing, mommy," still covering her face.

"I don't believe you, Daughter. What are you doing? Are you eating something?" (food is not allowed in our girls' bedrooms).

"Show me what you are eating." I said sternly.

She took the book away from her face and she had a mouthful of candy. So, I walked over and pulled her blanket up... there was a huge pile of candy and empty wrappers next to her. I asked her where she got it, to which she replied, "From your room."

At that moment I knew her chances of seeing her beloved Daniel Radcliffe as Harry Potter were nil. I just shook my head at her and said, "You just changed everything."

I called my husband on the phone and he was as disappointed as I was. We have had problems in the past with our daughter stealing from the pantry and hiding treats in her room. This incident was worse because she actually stole from MY stash in MY room.

So, when hubby got home, we brought her into our room, closed the door and sat her down to talk. She tried to blame everyone else for her actions, calling our attention to every naughty thing her sisters have done in the past month. Unfortunately for her, that tactic doesn't work on us. We explained that her actions have consequences, and she wasn't going to like them. When she heard she was going to miss the movie, she was upset, but when she heard that we were taking her 7 year old sister instead, she was livid! "That's not fair!!"

We added to the consequence that while we were at the movie, she had to write a paper explaining how actions have consequences and how her actions affected the people in her life.

She thought we'd change our mind at the last minute and let her go afterall, but those hopes were dashed as we loaded into the car and pulled out of the driveway, leaving her home by herself to pay the piper.

The movie was great and our Middlest really enjoyed it. It wasn't too scary for her, even though there were some parts where she was leaning a little closer to hubby. LOL

Our eldest will just have to wait until it comes out on DVD.

Can You See Me Now?

I took my middlest daughter to the eye doctor last night, on the behest of her school teacher. My sweet 7 year old had never said anything to me before about not being able to see well, but when I asked her yesterday, she said if she's in the back of the room, she can't see the front, and vice versa. So, I made the appointment and we went.

I was concerned that the doctor would tell me that she is fine and can see well without glasses, I was also worried that he'd tell me she couldn't see and would need a pair right away. I guess I just have a hard time thinking of my kids as "broken." The first time my oldest lost a tooth about keeled me over, but that's another story for another time.

As I sat in the exam room and listened as the doctor asked my kid, "Better, or worse?" I thought of one of the later-season episodes of Little House on the Prairie, where the boy went to see Doc Baker. His story was that he couldn't see and wanted a pair of glasses. In all of his back-woods wisdom, Doc Baker gave him a pair of plain-glass glasses and miraculously the boy could see. Turns out, the kid just wanted to look "smart." Could this be my kid too?

But, to my relief (?) the eye doctor turned to me and said, "she definitely needs glasses."

We picked out a couple of frames and she looks rather cute. My oldest daughter was so jealous of her younger sister and the attention she was getting that she sulked from the moment we walked into the doctor's office, muttering "she's faking, she doesn't need glasses. She's going to look so ugly. Glasses are dumb." Sigh.

I paid the bill (which wasn't as bad as I thought it would be) and we headed home. We will pick up the glasses in about a week and a whole new world will open up to my middlest. I was about her age when I got glasses for the first time and I remember looking in awe at the trees as I rode home -- there were actually individual leaves on each branch! Woah! I'm excited for the same crispness to be revealed to B.

I was interrupted from my reverie when, from the back seat, my sweet 7 year old asked, "Mom, can I get braces too?"

Double sigh.

I am Woman!!

I changed my first tire today!

This afternoon I was waiting for my kindergartner to get home from school. The carpool was running a bit behind and just as I was thinking maybe it was my day to drive and I'd missed it, the familiar Toyota Sienna pulled up and my daughter climbed out. My friend (the carpool driver for today) called me shortly thereafter to tell me that she had been running late because her car had a flat tire. I told her to drive back over (she just lives a couple houses down) so I could fill her tire with my husband's air compressor -- thinking we could fix it temporarily so she could drive to the tire place.

I hooked up the compressor hose and began filling the tire, but the air wasn't going anywhere. I looked under the car and saw that the tire had come all the way off the rim.

Time to get the spare.

It took us 20 minutes to figure out how to get the spare tire out and another 10 minutes to figure out where to put the jack. You'd think they'd put better diagrams in car manuals. Sheesh!

Once that was accomplished, the next hard part was getting the lug nuts loosened. It took a lot of grunting before either one of us was able to get even one loosened. Thankfully there were only 5 of them!

We managed to get the tire off, the spare on, and clean up all within an hour. And, we did it all without a man! She was able to drive on the spare to Sears to have her tire replaced and all is well. I'm pretty impressed with myself today (although I doubt I could have done it without her).

I am woman, hear me ROAR!!!

Over the weekend my husband and I went out to dinner, just the two of us. We went early enough that there weren't huge crowds waiting to be seated and we were able to get in within 5 minutes.

We ordered our meals and waited. The kitchen was a bit backed up so the waittress brought us free chips and salsa, which was fine by us since we were enjoying the chance to catch up on each others' lives (this was our first chance to get out alone since he got back into town).

As we were talking, I looked up and saw a girl walking in to be seated. I called her name, "Jessica!" She turned and stopped. I was smiling at her and waiting for her to say something to me. I could tell she didn't recognize me... It took several seconds and the light went on... "Wow," she said. "I haven't seen you in ages!"

We chatted for a minute or so, and then she called over her husband to introduce him to us (last time I'd seen her, she wasn't married). She says, "this is my husband Marshall." I couldn't believe it! She'd gone and married one of the biggest dorks in our graduating class! Not only that, but she was about 60 lbs. heavier than I remember her last.

Jessica and I were close friends in high school and had many classes together -- as with most of the friends you have back then, we lost touch. It was good to see her again, though I'm surprised she didn't recognize me as quickly as I recognized her (despite her larger size). I don't think I've changed that much over the years.

Before we left, I'd written my phone number and email address down on a card and gave that to her. I hope she'll keep in touch. Besides, I'm just DYING to know how she came to meet and marry Marshall G!!!

Just say NO

Former First Lady, Nancy Reagan, said it best when she admonished the Nation (young and old) to just say no. Of course, she was speaking about drugs, but why couldn't it apply to other aspects of our lives?

It seems like I've been so busy lately doing things for other people, at the expense of my own sanity and well-being. Why is it that when I get the phone call asking me to do something I always say YES? My mind is screaming NO, but my mouth says YES every time. UGH!!

In fact, I was so excited for today since I didn't have anything going on... first day in two weeks that I get to myself. And, no sooner had I settled down to veg when the phone rang. It was my neighbor asking me if I could watch her little girl for her this afternoon so she could go over to the school for Parent Teacher Conferences. Like an idiot, I said YES. So much for my "free" day.

"NO." It's a teensy weensy little word... so why is it so hard to say? Am I afraid the world will come to an end? Will I be blackballed and ostracized because I didn't drive carpool one day? Will the whole of society quit functioning because I didn't pick up supplies for a Relief Society activity?

ACK!!!

Grateful to be here today

Had a very scary day today. I'm thankful to be sitting here typing instead of what the alternative could have been....

You know those moments in life that seem to be going in slow motion, almost as if it is happening to someone else and you are merely watching it with the slo-mo button on? I had that today.

My kindergartner and I were out running errands. She likes to go to the credit union with me becuase the tellers always give her a sucker and she gets to have some alone time with Mommy. Since it was lunch time, I figured I'd stop and get us something from Wendys (they have a great 99 cent menu!) but as we approached a main intersection, I was dismayed to see that the lights were out, turning it into a giant four-way stop. That can prove to be tricky on a multi-lane busy road....

We patiently waited our turn and we finally got to the front. I was traveling East and a lady was to the left of me driving a compact car. We were both going straight. So, we wait for the east-bounders to go. Then the north-bounders went. The south-bounders were next, then it would be us. I was talking on my cell phone (not illegal in my state) and I watched the two southbounders go through the intersection, but then I saw a third go through... a guy behind the two front cars decided he was sick of waiting. I shook my head and commented to my husband (whom I was talking to) how people get too impatient when the traffic lights aren't working properly.

It was our turn and both the lady next to me and myself proceeded into the intersection. I was in no hurry -- Wendy's was just up the street and I was looking forward to my fries and chocolately, creamy Frosty. The lady must have been more anxious because she was a bit faster than I was. Just as I was adding pressure to the gas pedal I see out of the corner of my eye a black Blazer coming towards us. He was going southbound and was not going to stop for the light. That's when someone pushed the slo-mo.

I saw the Blazer coming from my right, I saw the little green car pulling ahead of me, I saw the Blazer moving in, passing in front of me and totally smashing in the poor lady. I was frozen in time as I watched her car spin a complete 180 to where she was facing east and I noticed the child sitting in the back throw their arms up to cover their head. Then, it was over. All the cars had stopped moving and I was still sitting in the middle of the intersection, not knowing what to do.

It all happened so fast!

My knees went weak, my hands were shaking. What should I do?

I knew I had to get out of the intersection, so I squeezed my car between the lady and the blazer and then I kept driving. I saw a guy jump out of his car with a cell phone, so I figured there were enough witnesses and enough people with cells to dial 911. I drove to the Walmart parking lot where I had been heading in the first place, parked the car and just sat.

My daughter was sitting behind me, and for the first time I heard her little voice. "Mommy, that was scary!"

"Yes, honey, it really was."

I had hung up on my husband right after the impact, so I picked up the phone to call him back. He had thought, in my haste, that it had been me in the accident so he was relieved to hear my voice. I explained the details to him and suddenly it all caught up with me and I started sobbing. I realized that it should have been my car that was hit. I was on the right side of the lady's car and the Blazer had come from the right. It should have been me.

I heard the ambulances heading to the scene. Six minutes -- not bad.

I'm so thankful that we were spared today. with my husband out of town, no medical insurance and money already as tight as it is, a car accident is not on the top of our "To Do" list. I gathered my composure and went through the Wendy's Drive-through and picked up some lunch and two Frosty's then went home.

It's 12 hours later now. Earlier this evening my sweet kindergartner commented to me: "Mommy, I still hear the sound in my head. It's a scary sound." I wonder if she realizes just how scary it really was??

Tonight before I sleep, I'll say a prayer, telling Father just how thankful I am that we were spared and that our family could go through the rest of the day normally. I will also ask him to bless the lady and her child who were not so lucky today and pray that all will be well with them again. I'll ask for forgiveness for not stopping to offer my help. And, finally, I'll pray that the guy in the Blazer will learn patience and compassion.

It was a harrowing day, for sure.

I dreamed about him last night. In my dream he decided to come home early and surprise me. I was so happy to see him and the girls were ecstatic -- dancing around him and giggling.

But, I woke up and his side of the bed was still empty.

It will be at least 8 more days until he is able to come home. The separation is very difficult. I still keep my cell phone with me at all times. It's comforting to know that through that little contraption, I can hear his voice in a matter of seconds. Technnology is awesome!

I think I'm coming down with something. I'm not feeling particularly good today and I can feel chest congestion building up. I just don't have the time to be sick. And, it's not like my kids will allow me to be sick either... they are so demanding. I could try calling my visiting teachers for help, but the entire time I've been on her list I haven't seen her more than one time. It frustrates me that I don't have the kind of visiting teacher that I am. Not to say that I'm oh so perfect, but I make an effort to know that my sisters know they are thought of and cared about. I make an effort to go each month and I take special care to talk to them otherwise as well -- like call out of the blue, or sit next to them at church. I have taken in more meals than I can count, but have never received one. I guess I should be lucky that circumstances have been such that I don't need a meal brought in... but, well, I fear that if I needed it, I wouldn't get it.

So, it's silly to think I'd get any help from there.

Look at me whine. Sheesh! I didn't mean to start this post so I could sound like a cry baby. I better end here.........

2 Down

I've now had two nights without him. The nights are the hardest. I don't sleep well and I continually find myself on his side of the bed. I'm constantly waking up, and then my mind starts to wander and think too much and then it's hard for me to go back to sleep. I'm really hating this separation.

But days are a bit easier. I've been busy with the kids' school and Church stuff. I worked all day on Tuesday at my job, which really ate up a lot of the day. Today, I had a friend over and we made spaghetti sauce with the tomatoes I harvested from our back yard. I feel a sense of accomplishment from getting that done. Now I have the task of cleaning up my kitchen. Joy.

I haven't had a lot of time to mope -- although when I have quiet moments that exactly what I want to do. It's kinda silly of me to be taking this so hard. He's just on a business trip, for heavens sake! How in the world would I be able to handle life if he were to die??

I'd never be able to have even made it to today if it weren't for my friend, Lammy. She may be an "online" friend (for now), but she's the best one I've got. She always knows the things to say to brighten my mood. Monday morning when I was feeling my worst, she was there, giving me encouragement and understanding. She's my rock. She makes me smile and I always feel better after talking to her. Everyone needs a friend like her -- and I can't tell you how long I've prayed for one! She's an answer to prayers in every way. Between her and Verizon Wireless, I think I'll get through these remaining 12 days unscathed.

Onwards and upwards.

Like Sands in an Hourglass

The day I've been dreading for months has arrived. I knew this day was coming, and I tried to prepare myself, but no amount of preparation can make it any easier.

My husband left this morning at 7:00 a.m. to be gone for 2+ weeks. To some women, 2 weeks is no big deal and I shouldn't be feeling so upset. I think of the military wives who I saw on the news recently saying goodbye to their husbands for 18 - 24 months. THEY are the ones who have a right to be upset, right? Of course, but that doesn't make this easier for me.

I'm not handling the separation well. I've been teary for days, but I couldn't let him see that because he says my sadness makes him feel guilty for going. His trip will be a good thing for us because it's a job that is paying really well, but even the money isn't helping much. I'm feeling so many emotions and I am just not dealing with them correctly.

Yesterday was my husband's birthday... and being a Sunday there were a lot of other things that needed to be taken care of. There was church and meetings, helping him pack, fielding phone calls and visitors and all the while trying to spend as much time together as a family as possible. My mom came by but only stayed about 45 minutes. His dad and step mom came over in the evening -- I was just putting dinner in the oven when they came. I was hoping they'd only stay for a few minutes, but an hour later, dinner was coming out of the oven and they were still here. They didn't get the clue that we wanted to have this meal together as a family ... alone. My husband invited them to stay, which they did. I hadn't planned on guests, so we really didn't have enough food. I didn't even get to sit next to my husband! They really overstayed their welcome.

They left at 8:30, just in time for us to put the kids to bed. I had hoped they'd be able to spend more time with Daddy before then, but it was a school night. So, they went to bed and hubby and I relaxed and watched a movie we'd rented. Then it was bedtime. He wanted to get an early start so he went right to sleep.

I wasn't as fortunate, so I took a sleeping pill to get me through the night. Otherwise I know I'd have been crying until the wee hours.

Now he's gone. He woke up, ate breakfast, woke the girls, we had a family prayer and he left.

I got the girls off to school, but not without massive drama. I'm typing this with a pit of guilt in my stomach, on top of all the other crappy feelings I have. My two youngest girls share a room and I have been after them for days to get it cleaned up. It's an absolute disaster in there. But, they somehow find other things to do than clean. So, this morning, when the carpool arrives 10 minutes early and my youngest daughter can't find her shoes, I exploded. I went in to help her, but I just threw toys and clothes around. She found some old shoes and I told her to wear those, but put them on in the car. The carpool daughter was at the front door saying, "We have to leave right now!!" That statement REALLY put me over the edge. How DARE she rush me when they were 10 minutes EARLY!! And, since I couldn't very well yell at her, I yelled at my kids worse. My youngest daughter was already crying and I made it worse by snatching her books from her, stuffing them into her backpack and then literally shoving her out the door. I slammed the door behind them and stomped up to my room.

And, that's where I am now. Alone. I'm sad he's gone. I'm sad I treated my kids the way I did. I'm sad to think tomorrow may not be any better. I just want to go back to bed, pull the covers over my head and not come out for 2 weeks.

Crap.

Shhhhh, it's a Secret!

I've created a monster!

Saturday was our errand day and this particular Saturday found us traveling to the mall so I could visit Victoria's Secret and exchange a bra I'd bought. In I trudged, with husband and three children in tow. Saturdays are busy days in the mall and there were a lot of people waiting in the check-out line -- affording us a lot of wait time, which gave my oldest daughter (9) the opportunity to scope her surroundings while she stood off to the side with her dad and two sisters.

I made my exchange, as well as an additional small purchase, and we left. I didn't think anything of the whole thing until later when my husband pulled me aside...

He'd been with the girls while I did my business and fielded my oldest's comments. She was shocked that the mannequins in the store were dressed SOOO immodestly, not to mention the photos on the wall! She couldn't believe that her own mother would dare patronize such an establishment -- oh, the immorality!! Her father tried to explain to her that most women wear these articles under their clothing and only their husbands get to see, to which she exclaimed, "I'm never going to wear this stuff to get a husband!"

Okay, so I admit, I'd like her to have a sense of modesty -- it's very important in this day and age -- but, I sure as heck don't want her to be a prude!! I took her aside later and explained that every woman needs bras and underwear and every woman has a different sense of style. She will be able to choose to wear what she is comfortable in, and someday her views on undergarments and lingerie will change. (oh, how I hope they change, even just a little).

On a side note, my middle daughter, who is 7, picked up a pair of thong underwear and studied it for several minutes trying to figure out how they worked. When I explained it to her, she remarked, rather loudly, "But, it would be like having a wedgie all day!!" Yep, that's for sure. Thongs were NOT invented by women.

56K??

This message is being written at the slow-as-molasses pace of a 56K modem. Not that I'm a slow typer, because I'm not.... but everything seems slow when it's done with dial-up.

I entered the high-speed superhighway about 4 months ago. Wow, what a difference a few hundred kilobytes make, eh? I was able to do things and see things my dial-up ISP never allowed me to do before. It was awesome.

But, I hit a brick wall this morning when I tried to sign in, only to find my provider is down. I did my duty and called customer service to alert them to the problem, yet here I sit... and sit... having to resort to my modem.

I was explaining my plight to my husband who said, "At least you have dial-up to fall back on." I gave him this analogy, to help him understand a bit better (you know how men are):

Let's say you are a teenager again. Remember how excited you were to have a driver's license and were able to go anywhere you wanted to go and get there quickly? Well, let's just say your car broke down and you couldn't get it to start, let alone drive. How would you feel to hear your parents say, "Well, at least you still have your bicycle, right?"

He understands my desperation now.

Oh, how I hope they get my broadband connection back up soon. 56K is going to be the death of me!!

Anxiety

Iveritably, every six months, the card arrives in the mail: You are due for a visit with the dentist. Today was my day. I always dread the dentist -- have my whole life. There is just something sort of invading about having someone mill around in your mouth. I'd actually rather visit the gynocologist ... well, maybe not quite that drastic, but they are about the same.

Last year at this time I was having significant tooth pain and went in for my semi-annual checkup. Turns out the dentist said I would need a root canal. Unfortunatley, our insurance was new and would not cover such extensive dental work without first passing the trial period. I tried to convey that to my dentist, but he said it really should be taken care of if we wanted to save the tooth. My dentist put in a temporary filling and asked me to set up an appointment for a few days later. I did so with great trepidation, knowing it was going to cost over $1000 (which we didn't have), not to mention the pain that would no-doubt accompany the procedure.

That night my mouth was killing me! I couldn't eat, I couldn't sleep, and no amount of ibuprofen was helping. I broke down and asked for a blessing. I was blessed that I would awake the next morning with no pain -- though the night was rough, morning brought significant relief.

I kept my appointment to go in for the root canal, but not without preparing with lots of prayer for help in paying for the procedure and calmness in undergoing something I was not looking forward to. I sat in the chair and explained my plight once again to my dentist, even explaining the blessing and prayers offered on my behalf. He asked if I was feeling pain, I said no. He was surprised. He decided to take an extra x-ray and was astonished to see that the tooth didn't appear to be as bad as he'd originally thought. No root canal would be needed.

WHEW! Imagine my relief.

He now refers to me as his faithful miracle patient. He even mentioned me in a testimony meeting he was conducting in his ward (he's a member of his ward's bishopric). I don't know if I'd go as far to say "faithful" since I asked for a blessing out of desperation -- but I'm so thankful that it worked and my mouth was healed!

So, every time I go in to see my dentist, I fear that the need for a root canal will return since our insurance will now cover one. But, today I received a clean bill of health. Mouth looks great with no signs of looming danger.

Look ma, no cavities!!!

I'm one happy camper! Only 6 more months remaining until my next appointment.....

One Week

Okay, so it's been a week since I started working out. I've done pretty well with consistency. By Wednesday it was difficult for me to walk up and down stairs because my leg muscles had taken such a beating! Doing the workouts on Thursday was a real trial, but I got through it and feel good about myself for sticking with it.

I've taken a few days off due to a visit from my Aunt Flo and I have finally regained normal movement in my legs. I'll be starting again tomorrow.

Now, I just wish it weren't my legs hurting... Gotta get the glutes and abs burning more since that's where I want the workout the most...

Ain't it great to be a girl?

One day down....

I started working out today. I've noticed that as the numbers in my age are increasing, so are the numbers on the scale. I refuse to buy a larger size in pants and I'm sick of not being able to breathe in the ones I have.

So, I broke down, bought the video and ball from Television (you know the one ... don't deny you haven't considered buying it yourself!). I started the program today on the "Fundamentals" (they emphasise the "fun" in the word, but I wasn't laughing when I was finished). That workout really kicked me in the butt! Wow, it was hard. My legs were still wobbly two hours later! The video promises results after only 6 weeks... I'm holding them to it.

Now, if I could just use a little more willpower to quit drinking Coke and eating Ding Dongs, I may just be able to breath with all my buttons done up on my jeans!!

One can only hope.....

Is that a gray hair??

It's only a matter of time now....

Saturday when the phone rang and I answered it I didn't expect it to be for my youngest daughter, who is 5, and I certainly didn't expect it to be a boy.

If she's got boys calling her after barely starting Kindergarten, what do I have to look forward to??

Having three daughters is going to do a number on me, I can already feel it starting!!

Other People's Kids

I have three kids of my own, and I like to think they are pretty well-behaved. So, why is it that other people's children aren't more like mine? It seems the kids around the neighborhood here have no respect for anyone.

A couple weeks ago all three of my girls were grounded for not having their rooms clean when I told them I wanted them done. Their punishment was to stay in thier room until they were finished, without playing. The doorbell rings and I answer the door to find two of the neighborhood kids standing there. This is the dialogue:

Kids: Hi, can the kids come out and play?
Me: No. Come back tomorrow.
Kids: Why can't they play today?
Me: Because they have to stay in their rooms.
Kids: Why?
Me: Because I said so.
Kids: But, can't they just come out for a little while?
Me: No, they have to stay home.
Kids: What did they do?
Me: (getting rather irritated) Just come back tomorrow...

And, I shut the door on them. What gives them the idea they can question me? Do they get away with that at their homes??

Not to mention the way they behave while there are here. Just yesterday I had my kids plus three other children in the living room watching Spy Kids 3-D. When I peeked in on them I saw my kids sitting on the floor watching the movie and two of the visiting children were jumping on my sofa! My kids have been sent to time-out for less than that... So I put on my mommy face (see below) as I walked down the stairs and told the girls who were jumping on the couch to get down, "we don't jump on the furniture at our house."

They looked at me like I was sprouting another head!

I'm sure they went home and told their mothers what an evil, horrible, mean mommy I am and ask if they could adopt my poor kids to rescue them from my sinister clutches.



Photo suits me, eh?

To Ebay, or not....

Hello, my name is Angel and I'm an Ebay-holic. It has been four days since my last purchase and 12 hours since my last search....

You know, that would be funny were it not true. I've been shopping on Ebay for just over 2 years and have even done some selling. They don't call it the world's biggest garage sale for nothing -- you can literally find just about anything there.

I have gotten some really incredible deals there -- I may not have needed the item, but hey, I got it for a steal! There is something about the rush of watching the auction count down with your name listed as "winning bidder." Not to mention the adrenaline of sniping an auction from someone else with just 10 seconds to go. Who needs drugs when you can get an Ebay high??

I realized I had a problem when my bank account went into overdraft yet I continued to browse through ebay, searching for another "great deal." My husband came home from work last night and there on the bed was the tattered remains of a padded envelope and strips of bubble wrap. He looks from me to the package and back to me again and asks, "What did you buy now??" I feel like a kid who got their hand caught in the cookie jar.... Eyes wide, as though I were a deer in the headlights, I answered him, "...but I got a great deal!"

So, no more! (or at least, in moderation). I vow here and now to do better with my Ebay buying. I will only go when I have the money to spare, and I'll limit what I buy. I DO NOT need a half-eaten tuna sandwich once held by Heath Ledger, or an "authentic" Rolex watch for $25. When the auction ad says it's rare and a chance of a lifetime, that doesn't mean it's MY chance of a lifetime.

Hello, my name is Angel, and I'm an Ebay-holic......